So maybe I'm not being temperate with the lemons or the cayenne, but these things I can handle.
Next up: what did I want to do and what did I actually accomplish?
- Lose weight: Eh. Kinda. I lost like 5 pounds or something. Numbers are misleading though, measuring my body fat and it hasn't changed as much as I'd like it to. Back to handstands and go-go dancing, I guess.
- Examining my relationship to food and drink: Hardcore. The number of times that I wanted to eat something horrible for me and stopped myself only to find that I didn't really need or want it is rather amazing. Also: I don't really crave bad foods as much anymore. That's rad. And drinking. Well. If you'd have told me I could stay away from whiskey and champagne for 10 days about a month ago I would have called you delusional. But it was shockingly easy and while I totally had a French 75 the other night and fucking *loved* it, I have spent most evenings all sober and shit. Not a bad deal.
- Experimentation with lack of indulgence: I performed the experiment but did not learn much. My dreams got cooler for sure, and overall I felt more awesome but I think that just had to do with knowing I could do what I was doing and not lose my shit. So well. I didn't go cray. But I didn't reach any Buddha-like states of enlightenment either. I am still not fully Realized.
- Seeing if I can fucking do it: Turns out I can.
Enough about that. Done looking in the mirror. Tonight I get to play goldfish in bowl instead, at a nightclub I can lose my short-term memory for a bit and it's all good.
Hey, have I seen you somewhere before?
Yeah. In line for the bathroom 10 minutes ago.
Shit like that. Everyone is brand new under dim lights with a DJ spinning. There's no way to get familiar.
Fuck Familiar. Unless you're talking about a pet lion. Or an ocelot. Having a magical ocelot would be cool. Buddha wouldn't mind that, would he?
No. I don't think he would.
I gotta go buy more lemons and finish my nails. Later alligator.